Welcome to Volcano Venting

Welcome.

This blog was created for Kritter Korner’s, Kritter Girl, (known as Witchy Woman at Venting Volcano) because she mentioned about having a blog to “vent”; so, because I believe, like Humphrey Bogart, “What Baby wants, Baby gets” – I have set this up.

As her editor, I will continue to support her in her endeavors here, just as I do at Kritter Korner.

Witchy Woman has accepted the challenge and you now are viewing the results.

Have anything to vent about? Send your vent to witchy_woman@earthlink.net.

Editor, Keith Lehman
Editor/Author/Publisher – Lighthouse Patriot Journal
Editor/Guest Writer – Kritter Korner

Cover Your Mouth

School has only been back in session about two months and the kids are already missing school. They’re sick, colds, flu, pink eye you name it it’s going around.

Sure there has been a change in weather here, as like anywhere else, after all it’s fall and you need to dress warmer.

But, come on people….. Cover your mouths; use your Germ-X!

Don’t go to school when you are sick, thinking its okay because your friends have been sick as well.

They ask what’s with that?

Speed Passing

The other afternoon after walking one of my client’s dogs I was on my way home doing about 57 with a posted speed limit of 55 and this VERY impatient driver behind me was riding my bumper.

Oh how I hate that!

I was SO tempted to tap my brakes to get this person off my bumper.

I could tell that this person wanted to pass me. I was approaching a hill in a no passing zone no less!

If you are in that much of a hurry to get somewhere on time leave earlier for Pete’s sakes.

What are you thinking!!

STUPID do you NOT see the lines on the road?

You’re an accident waiting to happen.

What’s with that?

Greeting Card Holidays

For years the greeting card companies have made up holidays so you feel obligated to have to buy cards like on Mothers Day, Fathers Day, Grandparents Day, Bosses Day,  Secretary Day, and Sweetest Day.

Well okay, then what about – aunts, sister, uncles and brothers?

Don’t they deserve a day?

What’s with that?

Guys and Cars

Here’s one for you – Why is it that guys always call their cars “She”?

Like you can look under the hood and determine gender!

What’s with that?

Air Freshners

 The other night, while watching television, I saw several commercials about home air fresheners. Designed for all those moms be it the “owls or kangaroos” that I saw in the commercials who days were too busy worrying about how their house smelled.

If you clean your house, whether your work a job or not, does it not smell clean?

All I could think was masking the air in you house with air fresheners is not cleaning.

A lazy way out?

What’s with that?

Insurance Companies

This one is for those of you who don’t know, like I didn’t …

I recently received a notice in the mail telling me by Wisconsin law my insurance company has to notify me if my premiums were going up more than 25%.

Well it’s going up alright 27% to be exact!

Ouch!

Apparently some insurance companies are now figuring your premium rates are based on your credit score. So if you have a good credit score you get good rates, if not well… your rates are higher.

Okay, maybe I’m not the brightest crayon in the box, but what does my credit score have to do with how I drive?

What’s with that?

FURTHER READING:

Consumer’s Guide to Auto Insurance
Insurance Rates Expected to Increase - USAToday
Wisconsin Legislation Will Cause Auto Insurance Rate Increase - Scott Fitzgerald, Wisconsin Republican Senate Leader
Understanding How Insurance Companies Use Credit Information - Wisconsin Government Website
Wisconsin Auto Insurance May Increase - Smart Insurance

Dog’s Time

A long time ago I was once told that dogs have no concept of time.

If that’s the case, why is it every morning 5 minutes before my alarm clock goes off all my dogs are already fussing to go out?

It’s not like the alarm already went off to signal that something was happening!

What’s with that?

It’s Not That Hard

Okay it’s pretty simple people. You don’t have to be a nuclear physicist or a brain surgeon here to figure it out.

1. If you took it out…..put it back where you found it!

2. If it’s on the floor and doesn’t belong there…. PICK it up!

3. If the pitcher/container is empty DON’T put it back in the Frig.

4. If it’s dirty…..CLEAN IT!

5. If you’re done with the glass put it in the dishwasher NOT on the counter next to it, duh!

6. If it’s dusty…..DUST IT!

7. If the trash is full…..TAKE IT OUT!

8. If it’s hungry ….FEED IT!

9. If it’s on and you’re done with it….TURN IT OFF!

10. If the toilet paper roll is empty don’t just leave it that way for the next guy…replace it.

11. If the stuff is 3 foot deep and you can’t see the floors…..CLEAN until you can!

12. If it smells wash it…you know like the dog or the LAUNDRY!

13. If it’s open…close.

14. If you spill it …wipe it up

15. If it’s wrinkled…iron it! Unless it’s your Sharpei.

16. Perhaps a bit twisted…if it’s hard….beat it.

These are only some of the things I’ve heard from many moms lately, not to hard if you ask me, but that’s not what I hear.

What’s with that?

Human Alarm Clock

I find this very funny, and I gave my youngest son a hard time about it.  

A few weeks back he told me he was going to lay down for a quick nap and asked me to wake him up in a little over an hour, so he could get up and help me work our dogs on the treadmill, I couldn’t help but laugh.

I asked: “Is ALARM CLOCK written on my forehead??”   It’s not like he doesn’t have his own alarm clock in his room, which by the way I referred to. 

His reply was it doesn’t always work!

So I guess you can just call me “ALARM CLOCK”!

Another Mom job I guess.

What’s with that?

Package Directions

The other night I had a craving for some popcorn. So I went to the cabinet and pulled out a pack of microwavable popcorn. I proceeded to unwrap and unfold the packet of popcorn. I have done this so many time over the years since having my microwave and not having to make my popcorn on the stove-top, old fashion way.

For some reason I took the time to read the directions, don’t know why but just did. And I couldn’t help but laugh my butt off! 

The first step of my directions said to unwrap the package by removing the outer cellophane wrapper and then unfold and place it in the microwave. Now come on…. in order for me to read step one of my instructions I had to remove to outer wrapper/cellophane cuz the directions are hidden within the fold of the packet….

What’s with that?